An orgy in Brasil | | by
Anna Reisman - April 23, 2001. |
Brasil? Yes, that's the way they
spell it in Spanish, but it still alludes to that same
country, Brazil, renowned around the world for its rainforests...
and the meat they serve.
My friend and I had planned to indulge
in this food "orgy" for a long time. Finally,
we did it. We went to Brasil, the "all-you-can-eat-for-one-price"
restaurant in Old Vallarta, on the South Side.
There are a couple of things that
strike first-timers upon entering the place: the music
and the décor. You feel like you might be in
a place somewhere in the middle of the Brazilian Amazon
jungle. There are real trees growing from the floor
and through the roof, everything is painted in deep
shades of green, the floor looks like some sort of magnified
animal skin and there are animals everywhere... don't
worry, they're not alive! The music is Brazilian, with
that unmistakeable Samba rhythm that surreptitiously
winds its way inside of you, transmitting a subliminal
urge to get up and dance. I've been told that sometimes
they also play North American favorites.
The concept at Brasil is simple.
For $130. Pesos, you can eat to your heart's content.
Warning: this place targets carnivores, and especially
the hungry ones! For us, that was the idea: Miguel and
I are both carnivores, and we made sure that we were
hungry.
Before telling you about our meal,
I must start by mentioning that every day is slightly
different when it comes to the appetizers, side dishes,
desserts and such. On the day we went, the waiter began
by bringing us a plate of chicken wings with a Green
Goddess type of dip as appetizers. They weren't Buffalo-style
nor spicy-hot, but nevertheless deliciously-flavored
and tender. This was followed by a rich-yet-light cream
of squash flower soup. Yummy. Miguel thought he was
being smart by only finishing half... "to leave
room for the rest". My will power wasn't so good
so I just kept on spooning the stuff in. Then came the
side dishes, four different kinds of salads: a creamy,
cold macaroni pasta salad, another with carrots, raisins,
red cabbage and apples (wow!), a third whose main ingredient
was cucumbers, and a plate of sliced tomatoes, zucchini
and cayotes. Lovely all, but once again, we only took
one spoonful of each, just to taste, as we had to...
"leave room for the rest".
As we were finished trying out the
various salads, the waiter appeared with what looked
like a Scottish Highlander sword, on which was a sizzling
hot Merguez-type of sausage. He put the point of the
sword/skewer on my plate and proceeded to cut off a
tiny piece of sausage which he then deftly slid down
onto my plate. I thought to myself: "That's all?"
He gave Miguel a piece of the same size. The sausage
was delicious, juicy and not too spicy. As the various
items followed one another, I understood the wisdom
of "small portions".
Now, rather than repeating myself,
I should mention from the outset that each and every
one of the twelve meat items Brasil served us during
our little "Carnivores' Orgy" came right off
the huge grill, sizzling hot, tender and perfectly cooked
- more well done on the outside, more rare towards the
center so that every customer can have it the way he
wants it. The sausage was followed by cuts of beef that
included Mexican arrachera, shish-kebabs and top sirloin,
New York and Rib Eye that are sliced for you at your
table, always off the skewer. There was turkey wrapped
in bacon, pork with melted cheese, long ribs, Bar-B-Q'd
chicken, etc. Needless to say, we couldn't eat it all.
No matter how smart we thought we had been by leaving
"room for the rest", it didn't work. Oohs
and aahs summed up our conversation, until we had to
say "Please, no more!" "Are you sure
you wouldn't like seconds of anything?" asked our
waiter. "Positive," we answered.
The friendly, bilingual waiters at
Brasil have achieved a perfectly-timed service. They
know exactly how long customers require to appreciate
each item fully, and they show up with the next offering
just in time - unless the restaurant is packed of course,
then the comings and goings are more frequent... We
ate slowly, savoring each morsel and delighting in our
ability to compare it to the previous. It was reminiscent
of a wine-tasting session, except that this was meat.
For example, we got to discern the nuances in flavor
and texture between a New York cut and a Rib Eye, it
was very interesting and it made us feel like true connoisseurs!
Naturally, considering my need for
"completion", I just had to order a dessert
and I had made sure to "leave room for that"!
The waiter suggested flan, carrot cake or a mocha cake.
When I asked if we could get just a sliver of each,
he politely explained to us that it would be impossible
as the portions had already been cut. In any case, Miguel
was totally sated, so I ordered the mocha cake. Rich,
luscious, creamy and obscenely delicious! Coffee at
Brasil is the Mexican version of regular American coffee,
but with a dash of cinnamon thrown in. Three hours later,
we were ready to walk out of the restaurant, trying
vainly not to waddle too noticeably. What a great meal!
The original Brasil is located at
210 Venustiano Carranza, right at the corner of Pino
Suarez. It is open from 2:00 p.m. until late at night.
Tel.: 222-2909. These folks have done so well that they've
opened another restaurant, Brasil II, in the Paradise
Plaza shopping center in Nuevo Vallarta, Nay. Same price,
same delicious fare. For $130. Pesos plus tax and tips,
you can eat all the meat and side dishes you want. Drinks
and desserts are separate. Have yourselves an orgy,
all you meat-eaters out there! This is the place for
you. pvmomto3@hotmail.com |
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